Thursday, February 21, 2013

Grownups

So, like Christmas, my birthday came and went, and was mainly slightly nicer than I thought it was going to be, and generally less scary.

Mr Spouse and I had a little chat about where we might go for adoption no 2.  He is not keen at all to adopt from the US again, I said it wasn't my first choice but I wouldn't rule it out.  He however sounds like he'd be able to cope with the idea of concurrent adoption, which they are introducing in quite a few councils across the country, including our county council.  His main concern actually seems to be that he had a lovely time being a mainly work-from-home student while I was on adoption leave with Baby Spouse, and he wouldn't get that again.  I have to say I can see his point.

If it was up to me, I'd be on the phone to them tomorrow about applying, but it is really too soon, my head says it is too soon, and I generally hear on the grapevine that about a year after an Adoption Order (the equivalent to finalization) is when they might consider you to apply again. So that would be some time in the summer.

In concurrent adoption at placement of a baby you are foster carers and then if (which is always more likely than not, based on the children chosen for this scheme) the child cannot go home the carers adopt the baby.  I know how besotted Mr Spouse was with Baby Spouse from day 1 and I was worrying he wouldn't want to think about this because of the risk that the baby might go home.  But given that he's always said he'd be interested in foster care, we applied initially for foster care (though we weren't going to foster babies), I shouldn't have been too surprised that his reaction was positive - his philosophy, he says, is that we must see ourselves as foster carers. And that's exactly the right attitude, which I will try very hard to emulate.

I will keep you all posted, but this sounds like it might be plan A.

6 comments:

Twangypearl the Elastic Girl said...

I like Plan A. How wonderful it would be! Good luck, Dr Spouse. In due time, of course.

Anonymous said...

Wow, big decisions! I, too, am a fan of this plan. I think you two are very thoughtful parents and could handle the weird world that is concurrent planning/legal risk placement (as it's called here).

nh said...

I always like a plan, even if nothing is happening; it's always good to have a plan.

Hope it works out for you.

the boy's behaviour said...

Plan A sounds really positive, and very considered. Hope it all goes to plan whether it be A, B or C.

Thanks for linking up to the Weekly Adoption Shout Out x

Anonymous said...

wonderful that you are thinking of adopting again. I think concurrent adoption sounds like such a positive plan for the child and if you are able to have the right mindset to achieve this, great. Look forward to hearing more.

Thanks for linking up with The Weekly Adoption Shout Out

Unknown said...

wonderful that you are thinking of adopting again. I think concurrent adoption sounds like such a positive plan for the child and if you are able to have the right mindset to achieve this, great. Look forward to hearing more.

Thanks for linking up with The Weekly Adoption Shout Out